Dear Single Mom:

Dear Single Mom:

This photo was taken back in 2016 while I was living in Beaumont, TX. (I currently reside in Harlem, NY) I was living the best that I could with the knowledge I had then. I would say I learned a lot about myself in that time of isolation. But the reality is, I opened myself up to heal some wounds I wasn’t aware I had. I was faced to see the things I took for granted. And grow the hell up. I was also put in position to never EVER depend on anyone but myself. As my sister in Christ Kim says, “i finally accepted being a single mother”. And today I work harder to make things happen, rather than expecting things to fall on my lap. No one owes me anything. Not even my parents. We all have a choice. We choose a path and we make the best of it. So to the single mother that is crying and wondering why the heck your child(ren)s father isn’t doing his part, cry but dry those eyes once you are done. Leave the door open if it is a situation where it is okay to leave it open. Don’t deny your children the right to see them. But don’t beg. Don’t beg another human being to contribute in raising children they took part in creating. We shouldn’t have to beg or make someone do anything. On the other hand DO YOU. Do what you have already been doing. If you need a sitter invest in one that fits your budget. If you can’t afford one at all, find a program in your city that you may qualify for. Seek counseling / therapy for those oh so *bleeping* hard days. Save whatever money you can. Create a vision you want for your family and create action behind it to see it manifest. Make do with what you have and don’t you EVER EVER GIVE UP!!! I guarantee it, your child(ren) will grow up and KNOW who was ALWAYS there. To learn more about my journey, purchase an autographed copy today! @ HowiSingleMomit.com (my home page)

#singlemom #encouragement #dontquit #pushthrough #dontgiveup #singleparent #raisingchildren #coparenting

Parenting on your own. (Just one of those days)

This is one of those days where you take a mighty long deep breath and just have faith in God to grant you patience in this moment. This a picture of my boys in the doctors office at my Doc appt. When I say I am “presently” the only parent, I mean just that. I am the parent that does it all. I presently do not have a co parenting relationship with their father where he picks them up from school and we manage time in alignment with their schedule etc. It is presently non existent. From time to time I do have friends and family take care of them or pick them up from school for me or even have them for a weekend (my abuela). But times like this, it’s challenging. It’s challenging because you have no choice but to SUCK IT UP. And yes there are days where it’s a no brainer because you do this! It’s easy, you were made for this. You know, being Mommy. You are a doer. You cook, clean, wash their clothes, help with homework, nurture them, have family time, teach and guide them, protect them, lecture them, discipline laugh with them, all of it.

These are your children. You wouldn’t just leave them without their needs.

And the other parent, doesn’t have to deal with it, because they chose to. Am I annoyed. I am, presently. In an hour or even tomorrow it will be a reset day. And okay great day. And that’s just how it is.

#singlemom #parenting #raisingboys #singleparent #coparenting #family #raisingchildren